What two things could you do to help build or regain social trust?
Everyone seems to have a story about why they don’t trust our major institutions like banks, governments and even our education and legal systems. In everyday conversation we express our collective lack of trust of the proverbial bastards. Our most trusted traditional institutions are now openly ridiculed or investigated by royal commissions.
Trust even in the new institutions, like technology companies is also at an all-time low with Google and Facebook being the least trusted.
What is not as obvious however, is the erosion of trust between us – societies citizens.
We don’t trust people not to steal our things. Our houses are locked, our cars are locked and the new motto is lock it or lose it. We don’t trust our kids can walk safely to school nor do many older people trust they will be looked after in their old age. It’s hard to believe that 40{01332a80e2e652688e18927fa9a6162580960d47bc08263a3993439d666dcd52} of people in nursing homes never get a visitor 356 days a year.
Ironically as distrust becomes normalised many of us want more than ever, to find people, mediums and businesses we can trust.
Some businesses are addressing this need. The New York Times and The Washington Post are good examples of how subscriptions have significantly increased as they position themselves as trusted publications and reinvest in investigative journalism.
Trust is becoming a paradox. We want to be able to trust each other, yet many of our actions (including disregarding established social norms) erode the very thing we want. Alas, we don’t always notice shifts in behaviour until we look in the rear-view mirror.
Focusing on negativity, like a crisis of social trust, only paralysis us into inactivity. Making it too complex can overwhelm us. What if we asked ourselves what two changes in our behaviour could increase trust between each other? Two thought starters are:
1. Actively make eye contact.
Eye contact historically, is the most immediate non-verbal message that as humans we judge trustworthiness. Yet making eye contact is rapidly declines as our eyes are drawn to devices not each other.
Screen contact not eye contact is the new social norm. How often have you sat in a meeting with your manager, a consultation with your doctor or a conversation with your children and almost no eye contact is made as they work their devices. How do humans build social trust if we don’t even look at each other?
One simple action we can all take is being conscious of how important eye contact is and take the time to be present with people when communicating. Perhaps a new motto could be close the app and have a chat.
2. Reciprocate
If someone sent you a card, invited you to dinner, shared some food, the social norm was to respond and reciprocate in some way that showed thoughtfulness to others and helped build relationships.
The new social norm is to be busy. Busyness has gazumped reciprocation or minimised it to an emoji. Instead of teaching people how to respond to others and how to reciprocate, we are learning how not to respond or reciprocate in the pursuit of efficiency.
If we looked in the rear-view mirror, we would realise that when we overlook the layers of social capital that create meaningful, professional and human relationships we erode trust between each other. The very thing we want.
Is anyone doing it right?
Yes. Those people and companies who dare to look in the rear-view mirror realise the consequence of efficiency at all cost. Smart companies like Unilever know the value of reciprocity. They do this by using smart technologies and embedding company values that actively build trust.
For example, every one of the thousands of unsuccessful applicants get a personalised written report about their application. It includes why they did not get the job, how they could improve their application and can they remain on their data base. Very different to no response, or a one liner saying your application has been unsuccessful.
No doubt there are many other thought starters. The challenge is to start a conversation with yourself, your partner or your organisation. What two things could we do differently to help build, or regain social trust?
